Frogs and Snails and Puppy Dog Tails…

They are loveable, handsome, and downright gentlemanly when they want to be, but overall little boys are disgusting…


“Fffffttttt!” …giggle, giggle.

“Ok, ok… my turn! Ffftttt!” …more giggles.

“Let’s ask Mommy to stop and buy some poop for dinner.” …giggles.

“No, let’s ask her to go to Chick-fil-a Poop!”

“How about some poop ice cream!” …more giggles.

It’s 9:30pm, after my business class, driving to my grandmother’s house to spend the night, physically drained, mentally overwhelmed, planning the next few days and dollars in my head, I’m listening to fart sounds and poop conversations coming from my backseat I’m almost immediately disgusted. Then I remember that I wanted this: little boys. Granted, I had no REAL idea what it was that I wanted when I prayed for little boys, but that is in fact what I prayed for. I knew that I didn’t want girls. Yeah, their baby clothes tend to be cuter and they’re less messy and a bit more cooperative (when they’re young), but in the long run I was not up for boyfriends and menstrual cycles and the morphing into a pre-teen/teenage beast that little girls tend to do. My thought is that the headache of teenage challenges with boys belongs to Daddy and I will get a 5-year rest period. In the interim, however, I was unprepared for bugs and boogers and fart sounds and poop conversations.


There are times when I can no longer tune them out and my disgust reaches maximum levels – usually when I’m already tired and tense – but in this moment I allow myself to be entertained. At 4 and 6 they are my baby boys, and although disgusting, they won’t be this age and size forever. They will forever be my babies, but there will come a time that I will long for tired, late-night car rides filled with fart sounds and joyous giggles.

As a mom with a full plate, it’s hard sometimes to simply live in the moment. There is always another task, another thought, another job to take or another means in which to make money to secure this legacy that we’re building for them… but those things will, in fact, always be there. What won’t always be there are the moments of love and laughter and quiet togetherness that define your family. Stay and enjoy them when you can.

In my world Balance is an elusive unicorn whose horn pours coffee and wine on demand and leaves a trail of collectible, sellable gold dust in its wake. If I could catch this fantastical creature, my life would be that much simpler, but… yeah… In the meantime, whether I am able to get a lasso around Balance’s neck or not, I do my best to remind myself that every now and again I just need to stop and live in the moment – disgusting or not – and love this crazy thing called motherhood.


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